Sunday, October 16, 2005

A Moment Before the Plummet

Have you ever done a free-fall, like bungee jumping or sky-diving? Do you remember that moment when you were sprawled weightless in midair and time stretched out for much longer than the instant that it was, and you floated delicately above the abyss contemplating your now total commitment to plummeting into it?

I got that second job I mentioned. It's temporary, but here I sit on this side of it waiting for the chaos to begin as I drop into my new schedule, the one that starts at 4 AM. In short, don't bother stopping by this site for a few months, I know I won't.

See you at the bottom!

posted by chopper @ 4:32 PM | 1 comments

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Thanks Mom

As I sit here in the comfort of a Panera booth typing drivel that you, dear Internet, are actually reading (no, really, thanks for stopping by), there are two moms lovingly scrubbing my house from top to bottom. Good bye, cobwebs. Hasta la vista, soap scum. Do svidania, kid crumbs.

Why live on 50% of your income when you can live on 55% and have someone else clean up after you? That's what we were thinking, and [Rent-a-Mom] came to the rescue. "I think I'm gonna like it here!"

posted by chopper @ 12:01 PM | 0 comments

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Turn Your Head and Cough

Great news, I just saved a lot of money on my health insurance!

I had a physical today and earned myself a discount. There was nothing unusual about the experience except that my nurse, Jasmine, seemed to be new. She was a little too aware that I was a person and a little too unsure of herself. She tripped over her words when she told me to take off my shirt and lay down. She was apologetic about placing EKG stickies on me; she even seemed to be experiencing the needles with me, looking me in the eyes, taking a breath, and asking "Are you ready?". It might have been creepy, but I got a kick out of it. It made me feel like we were just two friends having a do-it yourself exam. She drew blood expertly and I barely noticed my Tetanus booster. The only thing that sucked was the ear canal irrigation. I've had this done by many different people and I know how it should be done. Well, she kept jamming it into my ear too far, and that scared me. At first there was a more experienced nurse guiding the giant ear syringe, but then she left us alone to finish the job. Ouch!

posted by chopper @ 12:10 PM | 4 comments